Tuesday, June 19, 2012

a terrific tuesday.

i've been waiting for today for a while.

like, at least a week.

the main reason?

i saw the avengers for the third time yeah!


so this is the part where i blog all about my awesome day. prepare yourselves.

first of all, my day starts with me going to bed at one. because i just really like to watch frodo get skewered by stabby pieces of metal. while watching frodo get skewered and make all kinds of awkward noises, i got on twitter and i checked the #lordoftherings hashtag.

guess who has eight tweets in the top fifty #lordoftherings tweets WORLDWIDE?

that would be me.

congratulations, you've won social media!

at work this morning, emma and i were tired. i'm STILL sore from piloxing, but i think that my butt is slowly recovering. practice seemed to take forever. but that's just how it goes sometimes. i did rescue a honey bee and i named him fred. the kids really liked him.

while typing that last sentence, the bowl of lucky charms that i had on my lap spilled. into the cushion of my seventies arm chair. congratulations, you've won social media.

anyway.

after practice i had some options.

1. i could nap until ten thirty.
2. i could clean my house.
3. i could run to target to get a journal. my therapist wants me to have one.

i watched lord of the rings in my swim suit.

i did end up showering. then, like a good girl, i cleaned my kitchen, because the twins were coming over for spinach lasagna.

side note.

my parents are in delaware for the week, and i have the entire house to myself. i cannot cook to save my life. so my mother made this huge spinach lasagna, and that's pretty much all i've been eating.

that and cheese bagels.

so i cleaned my kitchen to make my house look kind of presentable. i even picked up my room, which was weird, because nobody goes upstairs, like ever. i probably should've cleaned my bathroom. because that's just something that i need to do. and laundry. yeah. laundry.

before lunch i went to target to pick up that notebook.

i refuse to shop at walmart. so i braved mall traffic for target.

during spring break, my six CD player broke. it ate all six of my CDs, including the head and the heart and the lion king soundtrack.

if you know me at all, this is like the end of the world.

i also happen to hate the radio. and now it's what i'm stuck with.

so what do i listen to when i can't listen to my weird indie folk rock music?

metal, of course.


nothing like sitting in traffic listening to volbeat's "still counting" in noon traffic. especially when you're a girl wearing a bright yellow shirt and bright yellow matching bow. and toms.

buying my notebook took about eight seconds. i need some cash. it's not acceptable to use my debit card for a two dollar charge.

then i stuffed my face with blueberries and pringles. the lunch of champions.

and then...

I SAW THE AVENGERS FOR THE THIRD TIME. WITH THE TWINS.

i get there before the twins. i'm awkwardly standing behind this lady and her daughters that want to see madagascar three. and i'm looking at the guy getting their tickets and their popcorn, and he's looking at me, and one thought is going through my head.

is this the guy that sold me my avengers ticket last week? because i'm seeing this for the third time EXACTLY a week after i saw it the second time.


so it's my turn. i tell him i want a ticket to the avengers at one thirty. which is in like, two minutes.

we lock eyes.

totally the same guy.

it should be illegal
to be this attractive, mark.
hannah and emma come bouncing up. they want two tickets to the avengers and a small popcorn. we're   junping up and down excitedly and practically chanting MARK RUFFALO! MARK RUFFALO!

and this guy is looking at us is like, it's those crazy college girls. they're back. for more avengers. what.


unfortunately, we didn't have the theatre to ourselves. we sat in the middle and we had to be decently quiet. but we did spend an indecent amount of time quoting the movie.

"i watched you. while you were asleep. i mean... i was... i was present. while you were unconscious."

"SCHAWARMA."

we were on a tight schedule. today was our first meet of the season, and we had to get downtown by five. the movie ended at four oh eight.

we didn't get to wait around and see them awkward eating schawarma.

i'm not concerned. i'll probably go see it a fourth time. if you want to take me, let me know. i cannot get enough to this movie. and bruce banner.

yummmm.

so hannah and emma followed me to my house, because i live like, two minutes away from the theatre. we key into my big lonely house, and we literally snarf three pieces of spinach lasagna. i even threw together a salad! just for the occasion? while we were snarfing and making terrible eating noises, we celebrated my house turning five.

i should have a glass of wine after i publish this.

then we were into the twins' car and headed downtown to our first meet.

no indie folk. no metal. pop.

i think i can enjoy pop when i'm happy and with my friends. but when i'm by myself, it makes me want to break something beautiful. like my grandmother's china.

our meet is at poco. i've never been there, in my entire sixteen years of summer swimming. we're late, even after snarfing our spinach lasagna like boss women. and we get there in our coaching shirts and we pull out the tarp and carry in our bags and then suddenly we realize that we've been in a dark movie theatre all day.

it's ninety-seven degrees.


shade: none.

i forgot my water bottle.

the first twenty minutes was me assuring dying children that yes, we would get in the water soon. why was i not getting in the water with them? i had sweat literally dripping onto the ground behind me wherever i went. my shirt was rolled up and tied off. my sleeves were rolled up. i had my bangs pushed back.

during warm ups, i made my kids do six starts. i stood right next to the blocks and i let myself get soaked. soaked.

i was dry within ten minutes.

for the first dual meet of the year, it could've been a lot worse. the heat sheets were printed improperly. this was recitified almost immediately, and we each got new ones.

but the clerk of course, the nice parents that tell the kids which lanes to be in?

they had allll the wrong information.

emma and i spent a good ten minutes trying to rearrange confused children. i was focusing on not pulling a bruce banner.

this could possibly be hulk emily.
coach emily is much more amiable than hulk emily. if hulk emily actually exists.

i gave my new heat sheet to the clerks. that helped things a lot. and emma was truly a life saver and let me hold her clipboard the entire meet.

bruce banner emily stayed calm with the clipboard. hulk emily never came out. if there is a hulk emily to come out. may we never have to find out.

i have no idea who won the meet, and i honestly don't care. what matters to me as a coach is that the kids have fun and that they try as hard as they can. i ran into my club coach and he gave me a HUUUUGE hug and a kiss on the cheek. the sun finally slipped behind a tree and it was maybe... ninety instead of ninety-seven.

i got a water bottle. i did not die.

so emma and hannah drive me home, and we don't really know where we're going. we finally manage to get on our normal club swim path from southside, and as we're going through the fun curves of spy run avenue, we find that sammy and parker, the other two coaches, are next to us.

we wave. we make faces. we waggle our tongues. we're obnoxious.

then all of a sudden sammy and parker turn into chipotle.

hannah: WHY WEREN'T WE INVITED TO CHIPOTLE
emma: OM NOM NOM
me: man i can't even afford chipotle.
hannah: TRUTH. TRUTH.

so we're waiting at the light by chipotle and this high school kid is next to us. we have our windows down and we're blasting "life is a highway" and we're thrusting every time that he says "ride" and "drive". because that's what you do.

you thrust.

and the kid is looking at us like DA FUUUUQ.

did i use that appropriately? is that blog appropriate? i saw it on a meme once.

we make it home only running over one curb and waving at a couple in a convertible like we were really happy to see them. going down the hills of auburn, we pretended that we were on a roller coaster.

now i'm sitting here in my chair with a bowl of lucky charms spilled all over my lap and i can't stop grinning, because i had a wonderful tuesday.

i hope that you did too.

congratulations, you've won social media.

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