Friday, June 3, 2011


today is my twentieth birthday.

when midnight hit, i got extremely excited for about two minutes, realized i didn't ACTUALLY turn twenty until six thirty-six am, and went to bed.

when i woke up at ten, i didn't feel twenty.

but then again, i'm not entirely sure that twenty has a feeling. i'm not really sure if age truly does have a feeling.

what did sixteen feel like? it felt like a day where i went to church, had a birthday cake, and wore a new shirt.

what did eleven feel like? it felt like a day where i went to molly's house and we spent all day baking a super delicious birthday cake that didn't really turn out to be that delicious.

what did eighteen feel like? it felt like the last day of school and stomach pain from eating too many cupcakes in orchestra.

what did twenty feel like?

twenty felt like tweeting more than normal, having my boyfriend visit me from michigan, having my best friend ride his bike to my house to give me a gift, wearing a cute skirt, and eating a golden snitch cake. it felt like going to target and getting a little kid shower curtain. it felt like a good, happy, warm day with my best friend, my boyfriend, and my parents.

it felt like a wonderful day.

it did not feel like an age.

what does seventy-five feel like? to my grandpa, that feels like riding his bike seventy-five miles.

so i'm thinking that i don't think that twenty has a feeling. sixteen didn't, eleven didn't, eighteen didn't, so why would twenty?

this isn't particularly depressing to me, only decently intriguing. i like the idea of being able to feel a number, almost being able to feel something tangible. i really like this idea. in fact, i think i love this idea.

it's not plausible, feeling a number like it's a tangible thing. but i can hope for it anyway.

i had a great birthday. :)

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