my transition is almost complete.

it's sunday.

it's late.

it's been a long-ass day.

(by long-ass day i mean that i worked two back to back eight and a half hour shifts at kroger and i'm covered in bruises and scratches and my feet hurt all the way up to my hips.)

when i got home from work i snarfed a piece of pizza, which was a friendly reminder that i missed my grandma's birthday celebration, and then i sat for a while and bitched to my parents about work today because we were hideously understocked and it was embarrassing, and then i jumped outta my chair and yelled

I HAVE TO BLOG TODAY

and ran away.

it's been one of those days.

because it's been one of those days, i wasn't sure what to blog about. i mean, today at work was worth blogging about because SO MUCH HAPPENED! but like, i blogged about work yesterday and nobody cares about kroger except for my parents because they're "concerned about my wellbeing".

so i went back to my first post of this challenge and looked at my trusty dusty list of eighteen things.

after a day like today, only number fourteen made sense.

14. my ethereal transition into a bitter old woman

tumblr has taught me that you don't have to be old to be bitter.

you can be young and be bitter.

in fact, you can be a young, bitter old woman.

HERE I AM! YOUNG AND BITTER!

hashtag not safe for work.

this was on my birthday. lolz.

you know, there are a lot of things to be bitter about. and i'm bitter about a lot of them.

1. MALE ENTITLEMENT. I SAID GODDAMN.

like, UCSB. good lord i could go on a rant about that for days on end, but i won't. you are spared. but let me say this; you do not have a right to anyone's body. 

2. work.

this doesn't need an explanation.

3. living two hundred miles away from my long haired man friend.

he doesn't have a car. it sucks. but we make it work.

4. global warming.

like, don't you just get really pissed when people are like "omg global warming isn't real because this winter was so horrible" and you're like "OMG THAT WINTER HAPPENED BECAUSE OF GLOBAL WARMING"

5. yesterday on facebook there was one of those quizzes, you know those quizzes right? and it was like, which mental disorder do you kind of have?

AND I GOT RULLLLLL PISSED. because one in four people suffers from some form of mental illness and like... sixty percent of them don't get the help they need because they feel alone and alienated.

furreal tho, i wasn't president of active minds for nothing. that shit is serious.

6. student loans.

they are coming. and they want my money. i am not ready.

7. kroger discounts don't work on alcohol.

yeah that's pretty lame.

8. one time twitter changed my profile without telling me. so i put my headline photo as this.

SO BITTER!

(that's also my facebook cover photo and it's so perfect that i can't stand it.)

9. GAME OF THRONES AM I RIGHT? NO ONE IS SAFE.

as long as khaleesi doesn't die i think i'll be fine, though. 

10. not being able to watch orange is the new black season two on netflix because i promised my man friend that we'd watch it together.

the things you do for love.

THERE. TEN THINGS THAT I AM BITTER ABOUT. 

wow, this post is like, extra negative.

here i am, sitting in an oversized sweater, watching beauty and the beast on VHS and bitching about things, many of which are first world problems. but a few of them aren't first world but are like, ALL WORLD PROBLEMS like GLOBAL WARMING and MEN'S RIGHTS ACTIVISTS. 

so what are some things i'm super happy for?

1. my minivan. it's sixteen. it's ugly. it has a cute michigan sticker. it never gives up on me.

2. my man friend. he's very sweet and after i post this, we're going to chat on the phone.

3. my family. they're pretty much the best. and i love them deeply.

4. MY NEW BOOKSHELF! FOR ALL MY BOOKS!

5. applying for jobs in michigan. (this can also be in the bitter category.)

6. my VCR. i will never leave it.

7. my hella cute summer wardrobe of approximately twenty-three dresses.

8. mojito mix. and how often it's on sale.

9. the ability to blog. i never really take the time to think about how cool it is that i get to write whatever i want and have people read it. IS THIS REAL POWER?!

10. hamlet. because he's such a cutie pie.

LOOK AT THAT FACE. AWWWW.

sometimes i'm bitter. more than i'd like to be.

but most of the time i'm happy.

there's plenty of time to be bitter later in life. when i'm ancient and can't eat spaghetti without turning it into a scarf.