Monday, June 1, 2015

round five. bring it.

I'M BAAAAAACK!

before you yell at me or say "jeez, emily, where the hell have you BEEN this spring" just let me say that i have been asking myself the exact same question.

where i have been, an honest answer:

i have been working two jobs so that i can move out of my parents' house.

i have also been... well i've been watching a metric shit ton of netflix.

metric shit ton is a valid unit of measurement, as long as you say that it's metric.

my old free netflix, that i was bumming off of my ex's high school friend who masqueraded as "sam sucks cock", booted me off after three blissful years of free entertainment. i struggled for a month without it.

i made it a whole month. you have to give me credit.

then i caved and bought it myself and i've had it since november.

during that time, i've watched all ten season of grey's anatomy twice (NO JUDGEMENT, IT'S A GOOD SHOW), plenty of movies with my long haired man friend, a few episodes of some guilty pleasure stuff like hoarders, and all of daredevil season one about seven times.

that's an entirely different post.

honestly, when you work two jobs and your wednesdays and thursdays are twelve hour days, two things happen, the first being that you don't have time to blog, and the second being that nothing really exciting happens.

there were definitely moments in my life when i was like, "YES! THIS WAS SO GREAT! I WILL BLOG ABOUT THIS!" and "great" can replaced with "weird" or "funny" or "emotionally crippling". (example: YES! THAT WAS SO EMOTIONALLY CRIPPLING!)

that happened in college.

i've now spent a year out of college in the working world and i can tell you that i don't have these moments very frequently. case and point, it hasn't happened since my last post, which is dated back in january.

it's june first.

once again, june snuck up on me like a sneaky little bastard. you would think i would get used to it, since my birthday is at the beginning of june and i always anticipate my birthday a lot more than i should. (i'm the type of person that tells people that my birthday isn't a big deal as an excuse to mention that it's my birthday because in reality, I'M PUMPED.)

like, if i've been looking forward to my birthday, which i have been for the past month, you would think that june wouldn't have suddenly appeared.

but it did! i woke up this morning, shut off my alarm, and saw the little calendar on my phone said 1 and i was like, HOLY EXPLETIVE IT'S JUNE!

then i went and i worked out. we'll see how long that lasts.

june means that i do my blog every day in june GO! challenge, so here we are, yet again, in the inaugural first post of said challenge.

it's year five, you guys. this is the fifth year that i've done this.

raise your hand if you've stuck with me all five years!

congratulations, you don't have a life and neither do i. let's go get a drink.

as is the usual fashion with the first post of the month, i have apologised for my lack of blogging as of late (another new years' resolution gone to waste) and now i will give you a preview of what you might expect from the upcoming month if you care to keep reading what i have to say about a variety of subjects.

THINGS I MAY OR MAY NOT BLOG ABOUT. STAY TUNED.

1. my birthday. that's a given. (this one is almost special!)

2. my foray into the world of linguistics.

3. graduate school???

4. my van lives to see another year and another large chunk of my income.

5. how working two jobs makes me feel badass and also like a starving artist.

6. moving out of my parents' house? like... soon?

7. charlie cox's perfectly sculpted british ass.

8. on that same note, MARVEL'S DAREDEVIL.

9. wedding season. this has been covered before, but i'm becoming even more bitter in my older age.

10. hamlet. my lizard, not the douchecanoe prince of denmark. (tumblr will note that hamlet is the original fuckboy.)

11. anxiety and depression and maybe something else along those lines, we'll see.

12. the inflatable 5K that i'm training for! (once i like, pay for the registration.)

13. the new novel i'm working on. (GASP.)

14. how editing novels really kind of sucks? like, a lot more than i realised?

15. weird habits that you develop as an adult once you're out of school. like hoarding poptarts and peeing with the door open when people are home.

16. harry potter because i can't stop crying about it.

17. this weird chiropractic treatment i've been doing that's almost science fiction and definitely derogatory.

seem interesting? no? that's cool, you don't have to hang around. i'm surprised you still are. let's be real, i'm surprised i still am.

but i always come back! i take a four month hiatus and i ALWAYS COME BACK.

i made this blog my freshman year of college when i was 19. i will be 24 in a little more than 36 hours and it's still going strong. it might waver here and there and nobody's really sure what's going on, but it's still here, i'm still here, and obviously you're still here.

we have some work to do this month. as i say every june, it's a busy month. it's probably the busiest of the five months that i've done this challenge.

but if i've done it the past four years, i can do it again. and last challenge i got in a car accident and still blogged, so i've set myself a precedent.

(actually, now that i think about it, i wrote the post before the car accident and just posted it afterwards in a painkiller stupor. so the bar is not set as high as i originally thought. like the bechdel test. ankle high and nobody's willing to step over it.)

we're back at it. thanks for sticking with me and i hope you stick around this month.

let's do this thing.

i will leave you with two pictures.



here i am if you forgot what i looked like, or maybe you're new and haven't gone through my past five years' of posts. (no, i'm not the lizard.)


and here's this bumper sticker because it's weird, i don't understand it, and i'd probably put it on my van.

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